The first day, to Roncevaux, was the most challenging thing I’ve done. Two and a half hours before the end, my anxiety kicked in, wondering why I had not seen any houses or official fonts for many kilometers. Had I asked for some help or mental reassurance sooner from my companions, I would not have broken down emotionally on the final stretch, and that is my lesson. In the face of challenging circumstances, there are many mental obstacles to asking for help,

“I just want to get there.”

“I do not want to be the burden of the group.”

“I will see the end soon, so I should put this feeling away.”

And those toxic thoughts are exactly what makes all of those things happen sooner than you expect. Casey looked into my eyes and reassured me with words that are hard for me to remember now, and gave me the last sip of her water when I was having a hard time breathing slowly.

I am still coping with embarrassment, though today, when walking to Larrasoaña, I reflected on the constant lesson of reassuring myself through allowin time to be alone. From the very beginning I kept a slow pace, unlike the first day, and felt strong the entire day. So far on the Camino it only takes one day of emotional strength, and physical detoxing, to remind myself once more that I am more than capable, I am beautiful, and worth the time of the many wonderful people who have rejuvenated over the past two long days.