Journal Entry 2: 4/08/15
So far the project has been running fairly well. I have been able to get a hold of the people I need to in a timely manner and have been enjoying the feedback I am receiving on my rough draft. Looking back on my memories, the only memories that help me relate to why I want to interview my grandfather, mother and long lost uncle Steve, are those from my childhood. Like my uncle, I too have experience with adoption to a certain level. We share a common feeling of of having this whole side of our families we are not related to but truly love, and a whole other family we are related to but don’t even know.
My mom had me at nineteen. My biological dad, Mike, and her were high school sweet hearts and had been dating for three years before I was born. Once I was born however, my dad decided that he couldn’t handle the responsibility and wanted to pursue his dream of being a sound engineer in Hollywood. He packed his things and never returned to Washington.
Although it was strange he left, things weren’t all that sad. He hadn’t been very helpful even when he was around and my mom and his best friend Joe had fallen in love. Joe accepted full responsibility over taking over as my dad. I remember him telling me the story of when he knew he was going to be my father. He was seventeen years old and he and my mom and Mike were all in the same friend group from high school; in fact, Mike and Joe where even in a band together called Hippie Juice. It was one evening when Mike was nowhere to found and my mom needed a babysitter so her and her friend Amy could go to a Red Hot Chili Peppers show. They offered Joe a pack of cigarettes and taco bell for payment and he happily accepted. He fed me a bottle, danced around with me to a Led Zeppelin C.D and rocked me to sleep. He told me that it was while he baby sat me for the first that he fell in love, he said he just knew he was supposed to be in my life and I in his.
When Joe turned eighteen, my mom, who was now twenty, and him, got married. Mike heard about this, and although wasn’t thrilled still did not return from California. It was after they were married, in the year 1996, that Joe decided he wanted to officially adopt me. My mom contacted Mike and told him of their plans and that if he wanted to appeal he could show up to court. Mike bought a plane ticket and even got as far as the airport fully ready to not allow Joe to be my father. My mom and Joe waited for him to show up at the court house but he never appeared. Mike had turned around and went home. Joe was now officially my dad and for a time we were a small happy family.
Because Mike was never in my life and didn’t make any real contact with me again until I was a teenager, I never knew his side of the family or even him. I grew up calling Joe dad and being raised with his mom and dad as my grandparents and his brother and sister as my aunt and uncle. I always knew I had some other dad out there but it really never mattered to me. I had a dad that loved me and a new family that accepted me as their own even though I wasn’t related by blood. Although I wasn’t opposed to meeting this family I was actually related to, I wasn’t really looking.
When talking to my Uncle Steve about how he felt about being adopted he told me he had similar feelings. He knew he was adopted but had two loving parents so he didn’t see the necessity in finding his biological family. He said if he did ever meet them he would not be opposed but he as well wasn’t looking. He was satisfied. Having a mystery family is what connects me to this project the most.