Everyone has favorite everyday moments, or aesthetics that happen. I have been thinking a lot about the positive in each day, because I have been struggling to see it. Writing has lost it’s appeal, but so has reading and other types of creating I enjoy. Everything starts to feel like work.
This happens every once in awhile, but winter quarter at Evergreen definitely makes these moments more frequent. It is week nine now, and I know that the break is just around the corner. Just a few more days for me to get through, but there are moments that aren’t work.
This morning as I was thinking about the fact that I have to present this coming week, and that I need to write one last journal, and do one last eval, I just sat up and saw the rain beating against my window and frowned.
Now flash forward about two hours and I am sitting on a couch typing this and drinking coffee and there is sunshine at my back. I can feel the heat from the sun warming my tattoo, and see the dust particles floating in the air. The shadows across my arms of the tree branches behind me, and I remember this moment.
I remember watching speckles of shadow wave in a calm wind with bright sunlight streaming, and I feel calm. Everything I need to do stills in my mind. Even if just for a moment, my day has gotten better. I sit up and start writing again, and I know this is just for a moment, but sometimes I just need that one moment. The one spec of everyday to make each moment float like the dust in the light, like little creatures drifting in the air, peaceful.
For me this is it, writing one last sentence for one last journal, and knowing all I have to do is get through one more week of work.
And the dust settles.