Life as a Caregiver

3 days away from home, surgery, and morning release from the hospital, afternoon school speaker. I feel like I can hardly stand as I walk in the door, holding on the door frame for support. “Hi, I’m home.” I call in greeting, looking for the substitute caregiver that is supposed to be taking care of Jim, my husband.
Jim responds: “ Suz had to leave, What’s for dinner?” Instantly I’m back on full caregiving duty. I can’t eat yet, so look in the freezer to see what I can cook fast. Put fish in the oven.
Paper towels all over the kitchen floor, full of pee. House stinks. Pee Towels picked up, garbage taken out. Dogs let outside and food bowls filled. Go in and greet Jim in person, make tartar sauce, cook rice, empty the dryer, scrub the pee off the kitchen floor- sanitize, get the stink out. Empty the dishwasher, load, and clean the puke up off the hallway floor. Jims dinner on the table, go outside and collect eggs while it is still light. Wash the eggs, feed and water the chickens. Let the dogs’ in. “Maggie needs a bath”, give Maggie a bath- she stinks. Gather Jims dirty clothes and start the washer, clear the table from Jim’s dinner and put away the extra tartar sauce. Wash the dishes; put bags in the garbage can.
Vacuum Jims floor, clean his bathroom, change his bedding, fold clothes and put them away, fix lunch for tomorrow and package it so he knows to eat it. Change out the laundry and start the bedding. Blow dry Maggie :”she’s cold.”
“Jim, I need to sit down for a few min”
“ok; did you make my lunch? Where’s my bedding? when will it be done? Where’s the tartar sauce? Look, I’m giving the dogs food now (I already fed them, but they don’t mind a second dinner). I’m letting them out (I just brought them in for the night): what’s this spot on the floor ( I missed something); Sumo’s tonight, I need to get up at 1, set the alarm so I can watch.
Spot cleaned off the floor, Jims bed made, Dishes put away, sign on lunch to identify it for Jim, Show Jim the tartar sauce, Dogs in, Alarm set for 1am sumo. Jim showered and dressed, tucked into bed.
My turn, I sit. Oops, I didn’t eat anything yet. I’ll sit for a few minutes and find something; I didn’t fix my lunch, oh well. I’m too tired now. I didn’t take my meds, gotta get that done- in a few minutes, tired, hurting, can’t move.
Oh shit: The alarm is ringing, School time.